Modi heals India’s institutions by ignoring them entirely

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The central government on Wednesday promulgated an ordinance for senior bureaucrat Nripendra Mishra to be Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s principal secretary.

“Our institutions have been deeply corroded by a decade of United Progressive Alliance (UPA) misrule”, said Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) general secretary Amit Shah. “We have therefore decided to ignore them for a few years to give them time to heal.”

The government appointed BJP spokesperson Smriti Irani as minister for human resource development, a decision that many see as the welcome liberation of policymaking from cliques of “experts”. “We expect Irani to consult a wide variety of sources, ranging from the Vishwa Hindu Parishad to the Bajrang Dal to the Swadeshi Jagran Manch,” explained Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh national executive member Ram Madhav.

The selection of Sanjeev Baliyan as Minister of State for Agriculture and Food Supplies also provoked favourable comment. “Baliyan has learned a lot about reaping and harvesting in Muzaffarnagar,” said the BJP-allied columnist Swapan Dasgupta. “It will be interesting to see how the poultry industry fares when the chickens come home to roost.”

“The UPA’s legacy of tolerance and inclusion is thankfully behind us,” said the BJP’s Minister of Minority Affairs Najma Heptullah, shortly after declaring that Muslims are not in fact a religious minority. “This is just the beginning.”

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