Arvind Kejriwal unveils new era of transparency with tweet about bowel movements

Delhi Chief Minister and Aam Aadmi Party (AAP) leader Arvind Kejriwal unveiled a new era of transparency in governance when he revealed on social media portal Twitter that he had high fever and “severe loose motions”. To the relief of his supporters, Kejriwal refused to share any further details.

The revelation set off a political firestorm. Congress Party Delhi chief Arvind Singh Lovely accused Kejriwal of inventing a story to cover up a panic attack after reading his party manifesto carefully for the first time this weekend.

“The only motion the Congress need concern itself with is the forthcoming confidence motion in the state assembly,” said AAP leader Manish Sisodia sternly. “If they double-cross us the people of Delhi will send them on the runs.”

AAP leader Yogendra Yadav elaborated on the AAP’s inclusive political philosophy in an interview with the Indian Express: “Much of the positive energy that has come in the last three decades has been released by people’s movements. The Left and socialists failed because they connected only to certain kinds of movements.”

In an unprecedented outreach to citizens, the AAP is putting hourly updates on Kerjriwal’s condition on the Delhi state government portal. Sources say that the party is on the verge of announcing a free water quota of 700 litres per person fortified with sugar and salt suspension.

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